


she (means everything to me)

by GWritesNovels



Category: Dangan Ronpa Another Episode: Ultra Despair Girls
Genre: F/F, Fluff, maybe slightly OOC
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-17
Updated: 2020-09-17
Packaged: 2021-03-07 19:55:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,566
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26503255
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GWritesNovels/pseuds/GWritesNovels
Summary: "You could find her in a Polaroid picture, and she means everything to me." -"She", dodieIn which Toko ponders Komaru's confession of love.
Relationships: Fukawa Touko/Naegi Komaru
Comments: 5
Kudos: 95





	she (means everything to me)

Holed up in a small room of a hotel in the remains of Towa City, Toko Fukawa views the world with brand-new eyes.

As her wire-rimmed glasses settle onto the bridge of her nose, she squints at her reflection, scrutinizing every little detail of what she sees. Everything old clashing with everything new.

Nothing has really changed, she realizes.

But she sure as hell isn’t the same.

Strands of dripping wet hair hang in her face, and she runs her hand through it carefully. Water droplets trace the outline of her features, cleansing her disgusting soul away until there is nothing left.

Finishing the job her mothers and father had begun when she was young.

Her first rebirth. Pressure on her shoulders, the anchor of pure, unadulterated hatred weighing her down, water filling her lungs, vision going black, death calling her name.  
Yet somehow still surviving.

And when Toko arose from that water, choking and gasping and coughing, she did so knowing that no one could ever love her, not if even her own blood had tried to put an end to her. Of course, a warm flicker of hope still resided in her heart every now and again, when a cute guy didn’t tease her as hard as the others or even asked her out, though later she would always find that invites to dates were just on account of dares, punishments, and to get close to her so she could be further humiliated.

That’s why she had her sights set on one Byakuya Togami. He never once held his tongue around her, expressing his disdain as much as possible. His frequent remarks of his disgust towards her, his dismissal of her, once making a remark that he wouldn’t care if she lost her life, only drew her closer to him. It wasn’t healthy, but it was honest. He couldn’t deceive her, not with that brutal honesty. He could never cause her any pain, not like the others had.

And that’s why she was dead set on him.

Until now.

Her second rebirth. Shaking limbs running the water, dread coursing through her bones, heart pounding, blood rushing in her ears as she slowly stepped into the shower. Letting the heat wash away everything she had been. Scrubbing away the years and years of mistrust, trying to dig down under the flesh to rip out the pain of becoming herself, the pain of others’ incessant hatred she’d felt her whole life.

She hadn’t technically been successful, but she will try again.

Now, she stands in the mirror, re-evaluating every single thing she’d thought of herself for as long as she could remember.

Small, petite frame. Long hair hanging limply down to her waist. Ivory skin from lack of sun. And, when she hesitantly moves the fabric of her skirt up, tally marks. More scars from Syo’s scissors than actual skin. To Toko, they appear absolutely endless.

Her stomach churns and the fabric drops once more.

Violet irises flicker back up to the mirror after a shaky breath, and she mumbles, “Komaru.”

For many, many reasons unknown, the younger Naegi had told Toko she loves her today.

It hadn’t been like anything Toko had ever expected. It wasn’t anything like the countless novels she had written. No huge lead up, no lingering gazes, no anguish, no proclamations filled with the burden of having been held in too long. 

Just the words, “Toko, I love you,” murmured while they were walking home in a slight drizzle, the pitter-patter of rain hitting the sidewalk almost completely drowning out the other girl’s words. A brush of hands. There was no explosion, no fire inside of Toko’s chest, though there was a hint of warmth spreading through her cheeks and flutters in her stomach.

That was what made it reality, she supposed.

Now, she stares into the mirror, gaze never flickering away for a single second. She has to figure out exactly what it is that makes Komaru love her.

The thought sends another flutter throughout her body, and she smiles slightly. It’s an odd sensation, but not an unwelcome one. In a way, it’s still almost impossible for her to wrap her head around. The words echoing in her brain still shake her to her very core.

She hates that she hasn’t answered yet.

Not a single word has transpired since the confession. They made it to the hotel in silence before Toko had collapsed on the bed and Komaru had showered. The pair traded places quietly, and the deafening silence has remained.

“Toko?” A small knock at the door makes the violet-haired girl jump out of her skin. She opens it to find Komaru standing there, hair beginning to dry, looking up at her with concerned eyes. “Are you okay? You’ve been in there a long time, so I got worried.”

Ah, the younger girl and her huge heart. Toko doesn’t understand how the other girl could have ever thought she was just ordinary. She has the most compassion of anyone the writing prodigy has ever met.

Toko smiles softly and nods, an action that makes Komaru raise her eyebrows slightly. “I’m okay, I promise. I was just thinking, and I lost track of time.”

The brunette nods. “I get that. What were you thinking about?”

“Earlier.”

Komaru knits her eyebrows together. “Earlie---oh. _Oh_. I am so sorry, Toko, I never meant to tell you that way. It was a spur of the moment thing. I had just been thinking about Byakuya and how you seem to still love him and I just...got jealous, and---”

Toko shakes her head, hating how much the younger girl is worrying. She wants to say the words back, she really does. But there seems to be a disconnect between her brain and her throat, because the sentence still isn’t coming, no matter how hard she’s trying.

Instead, she says, “It’s okay, Omaru. Let’s go to bed.” The younger girl tears up, and for a moment, Toko screams internally. Did she say the wrong thing? She can’t bear the thought of hurting her any more.

But Komaru smiles that beautiful smile and nods, making her way over to the left side of the bed, and Toko realizes that the other girl is happy because it’s normal. The way they always have been.

Maybe that’s what she needs. Normalcy and reassurance.

Toko makes her way over to the right side, and before she can say another word, Komaru is snuggling up against her, her back pressed to Toko’s front. The older girl chuckles and wraps one arm around her waist, leaving the other free to play with the brunette’s hair.

All is silent for a moment, and then Toko speaks.

“I love you, too, Komaru Naegi.”

The flutters in her chest return for a brief moment, but at the feeling of Komaru’s muscles tensing up against her, Toko’s glee turns to fear. What if she wasn’t supposed to say that? What if Komaru just wants them to be friends, to pretend that this whole evening never happened? She seemed to need normalcy and reassurance and the writer just had to go fuck it up again.

The brunette begins to shift, hesitating for a moment. Then she fully turns over, looking Toko dead in the eyes. There’s so much vulnerability hidden in those dark windows to the soul that the older girl can’t help but look away, fidgeting nervously.

“Toko, please look at me.” After a moment, the writing prodigy complies, meeting that dark gaze once more. “I need you to promise me that you mean it. That it’s not some cruel joke, or that you’re not just saying it because I said it first and you want to make me feel better. Promise me that, if you say those words again, that you mean every single bit of it with your whole being.”

Toko nods, smiling softly once more and caressing Komaru’s cheek softly. “I promise. I love you, too, Komaru Naegi.”

The younger girl laughs, a breathy laugh that releases all of her woe. Toko stares in awe at the beauty of that smile, that pure relief so casually displayed. It’s honestly breathtaking, seeing someone who wears their emotions on their sleeves so easily, letting anyone and everyone see inside.

Maybe she can achieve the same again, especially if it will help remind Komaru that she loves her.

As they keep lying there, Toko thinks of everything that makes her love so lovely. It’s in the way that she smiles so brightly, as if she’s the writing prodigy’s own personal sunshine. It’s in the way that she works on each project so diligently, not willing to give up until it’s complete. It’s in the way she watches Toko write, that goofy smile on her face, eyes taking the writing prodigy in like she’s the only person in the world. It’s the way that she laughs and the way the Towa City breeze ruffles her hair and how cute she looks when she stumbles upon a manga she enjoys and the pure essence of her kind being.

“Whatcha thinking about?” Komaru asks, and Toko doesn’t have an answer. Words can’t begin to properly convey the swelling in her chest, how amazing she thinks Komaru is. Not even another “I love you” will do the trick.

So Toko just smiles knowingly and replies.

“Everything.”


End file.
